VO: The nation's favorite antiques experts, £200 each and one big challenge.

Well, duck, do I buy you or don't I?

VO: Who can make the most money, buying and selling antiques, as they scour the UK?

The aim is, trade up and hope that each antique turns a profit.

VO: But it's not as easy as it looks, and dreams of glory can end in tatters.

DAVID: I'm a loser.

CHARLES: Listen, why... VO: So will it be the fast lane to success or the slow road to bankruptcy?

Oh, there's a mouse!

There's a mouse!

VO: This is the Antiques Road Trip.

Yeah!

Traveling through the back roads of Worcestershire in their classic 1959 Hillman Minx are David Barby and Charles Hanson on their very first road trip together.

CHARLES (CH): We are like Man United and Arsenal competing for the trophy in series four.

David, you are the Wayne Rooney of the Road Trip.

DAVID (DB): Oh dear!

VO: So far, they're getting on like a house on fire.

David is an antiques valuer, who buys with his heart, not his head.

It's just got that little bit of, sort of, art reference that I enjoy.

VO: But he's planning a change of strategy today.

I think I should change my tactics slightly and possibly look at a more commercial element because I'm not certain of the auction room we're going to.

VO: Hmm.

Charles, on the other hand, is an auctioneer from Derbyshire, who like to throw himself into his buys.

So, your foot goes in like that... Is the helmet inclusive?

VO: And is a bit of a girlie when it comes to small rodents.

You watch.

Oh, there's a mouse!

There's a mouse!

Sorry, sorry!

VO: These two started the week with £200 each, but after the first leg, it's a different story altogether.

After buying cheap, risky pieces, Charles stumbled at the auction, leaving him just £243.80 to play with.

Squeak.

So, what's that - there's a loss of 10.

I can't believe it.

Meanwhile, David's love of quality left him rolling in £298.20's worth of lolly.

What a prize.

That was good.

It was touch and go, Charles.

VO: This week's road trip is a huge 300-mile sprint from Lichfield, south to Frome, back up north to the Wirral Peninsula and ending in Nottingham for the final showdown.

Gosh!

Today's show gets motoring in Malvern and if all goes well, should end with the auction down in Pewsey.

(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS) VO: Ah.

Elgar.

A bit of pomp and circumstance seems only fitting for Malvern as the famed British composer lived much of his life here.

The town's also famous for its spring water, believed to have rejuvenating powers.

Lucky old David.

CH: We're here, David.

DB: What an adventure.

I'm so excited David, because you know, I feel Malvern with its spa feel and its ambience of polite society, it's my sort of place.

Yes, and you need to be rejuvenated, you've been talking too much.

We'll go and get some water.

OK, it's kill or cure.

OK.

There's the water.

The Malvern water.

This is it, is it?

DB: Yes.

CH: Tell me about it.

Well, this is the whole basis and the fortune of Malvern.

Cuz it was rather like a sort of washing place, like Bath or Tunbridge Wells or Cheltenham, and people came here to take the waters.

You're saying the purity of this water... You actually drink it, not wash your hands, Charles.

OK. OK.

So, by drinking it, it might just give me the strength to go out there and find these star lots.

I hope not.

I hope so, David.

I'll drink more now.

VO: So, while Charles bounces off to the shops, newly invigorated... Having had that water, I'm feeling quite lucky.

..David is in the car park, thinking strategy and sensibly bothers to phone the auction house to get a lead on the forthcoming sale.

But there's a problem.

They start the viewing at half past eight, so that just means that we have an hour and a half for our goods to be seen by potential purchasers.

My immediate inclination is not to go for expensive items but at the same time, I don't want to buy rubbish.

VO: Oh dear.

So, with hardly any viewing time at the auction, our experts will have to pull something special out of the bag.

And Charles is already busy at work in Promenade Antiques.

They call me Hawkeye Hanson.

But thus far, nothing.

VO: Hawkeye Hanson, hey?

That's a new one on me.

Used to be the Young Pretender.

Well, it looks like the Hanson's radar has locked onto something and Leslie's there to clear the decks.

It's a suite table, but it's a bit tired.

It does have this... Nice little bird cage actions, there we go.

And you can see, it has got some filler here... DEALER: Some repair... CH: Some repairs as well.

So, a very nice little snap-top tea or occasional table, in oak, that would date to around 1780.

1780?

Yep, 1790.

I had no idea that it was that old.

There you go, so next time you get a buyer, tell them this was made, probably, give or take a year between the French Revolution.

VO: More like it's been IN the revolution, judging from the state of it.

CH: I would probably say to you... £30.

DEALER: No, that's not enough.

CH: And he's going, he's going.

It's not enough.

And the best price would be...?

45 at the most.

Would you take £40 for it, madam?

I will.

I'm glad that you like it so much.

That's really kind.

It's a bargain, £40.

Thank you very much.

I'll take it away now for you as well.

£40.

Thank you for the memories.

Thank you very much.

And that's history.

DEALER: Thank you, bye-bye.

CH: Bye-bye.

VO: Meanwhile, David is down the road in Foley House Antiques and the lovely Syd has the job of showing him round.

Poor thing - she looks young too.

Oh!

VO: Steady!

You'll have the whole lot down.

It's alright.

I like the Wedgwood mug, 1969 mug.

This is probably the best commemorative wares you'll ever buy.

It's Wedgwood.

Wedgwood factory are not producing in this sort of ware.

It's all detailed on the bottom there.

"Investiture of the Prince of Wales".

VO: Most commemorative ware is made to make a Royal event but sometimes it'll honor a noteworthy national occasion, like the visit of a Pope.

Unfortunately, Royal memorabilia is hard to shift, so David will be looking for a substantial reduction on that £35 ticket price.

Stand by.

Is that yours?

SYD: It's not mine, I can do it for £30.

Is that the lowest?

Um... £28.

Is that the very best you can do?

It's the very best I'm afraid.

Very, very best.

Well, £28.

Included with the box.

Oh, is that extra?

It comes combined.

Thank you very much, Sydney, that's lovely of you.

VO: Elsewhere in the shop, Charles has some startling news.

I found a bargain.

I can't believe it.

I found a bargain.

VO: OK, Mr Hawkeye!

What have you found?

I love it.

The whole voyage of my trip is about handling history and here you have got a true teapot, which dates to around 1770.

And OK, look at the handle... it's been broken and re-stuck.

The spout has long since gone but that silver spout would date to around 1800-1810.

And this Chinese Chen Lung King Dynasty teapot with a Georgian silver spout is described as an "old Chinese teapot, very damaged".

It doesn't do this baby justice, does it?

VO: (SQUEAKILY) No.

You're quite right.

I found this in a cabinet.

OK.

It's priced at £8.50, a very nice old Chinese teapot.

It's damaged, it's a bit tired, but it tells a story.

What's it's best price?

Um... do it for £6.

I like it a lot, it's just the condition, it's slightly tired.

Um... would you take £4 for it?

£5.50?

Meet me at £5.

Yeah, go on then.

CH: Are you sure?

SYD: Yeah.

Great, £5.

That's great.

Would you like wrapped for you?

That would be wonderful, thank you very, very much.

VO: It was a good deal at £8.50 but an even better one at £5.

Someone's very happy.

Oh, and a little skip too!

How sweet!

David, meanwhile, has abandoned Malvern and hit the road for Tewkesbury, leaving Charles on his tod.

What's striking about this Gloucestershire town is its black and white Tudor buildings and its famed Norman abbey, which was saved from dissolution in the 16th century when the townspeople bought it for £453 - a bargain in anybody's money.

David's first port of call - Annie's shop.

Measuring just 18 feet by nine feet, it's a bit of a squeeze, but at least everything's within stretching distance.

It's quite small, that one.

No, it's not me, is it?

I look like something... Oh no, I look like something out of Laurel and Hardy.

ANNIE: I was just going to say that.

He's nodding in approval.

VO: And do you know?

He really does!

Oh, and another.

Not so sure.

I prefer the bowler hat, but these are hardly the eye-catching antiques you're looking for, David.

Ah, but maybe that is.

DB: What I like about it - it's 1960s.

is it has that sort of moltened feel about it.

And this is case glass, because you have a clear crystal glass and inside it, you have that ruby glass and when the light's on it, it's very good indeed and people do collect this sort of color glass.

VO: This, he thinks is a piece of 1950s Murano glass, named after the Venetian Island of Murano.

The ruby interior with its clear casing is a typical feature of the island's glass factory - and others.

DB: What's the best you can do on this, darling?

Um.

What's on there now?

Narinder, £16.

ANNIE: (CHUCKLES) That's not mine, so I can only really take off 10%.

My hands are tied.

She'd probably go to £14 and that would be the best, I would think.

They wouldn't go to £12, would they?

Alright, £12, yes.

I'll risk it.

Annie, you have a sale.

DB: Wish me luck.

ANNIE: I will wish you luck.

ANNIE: Who are you up against?

DB: Charles Hanson.

Alright, OK. Oh, no contest.

VO: Oh!

Well, we'll see.

Charles is taking a break from shopping to indulge his ferocious passion for history.

Oh, don't be misled by the house - there's a museum behind it.

CH: Steve.

STEVE: Charles.

Good to see you, Charles Hanson, may I come in?

STEVE: Come on in.

CH: Thanks Steve.

Thanks very much.

VO: Behind this ordinary-looking bungalow is an 80-foot shed and it houses Steve Wheeler's very unusual collection.

Unbelievable, Steve.

STEVE: A lot of bottles from virtually everywhere, I suppose.

VO: They are in fact milk bottles.

About 17,500 of them.

That's some 14 tons of glass.

The different sizes, shapes and advertising on the bottles each tells a story of bygone days.

Can I ask one really important question, so fundamental - why?

Because people throw them away.

The social history in a milk bottle where is goes back and forwards, back and forwards from a milkman to a dairyman and then people just throw them out.

So, Steve, how did it all begin, really?

Well, finding milk bottles on walks.

If a bottle was found, it was me that put it in a rucksack and took it home to find out where it came from.

VO: That was 30 years ago.

Since then, he's got them from the strangest of places.

How do you find these bottles?

I'd say, "Who delivered your milk?"

and you'd say, "Oh, he's long gone now, "but he was such and such."

I would then track down, were there any family left or is the dairy still going, who bought it.

Yes.

I would talk to electricians, because when they rewire a house, where do they find the old milk bottles the builder left behind?

Under the floorboards.

Ladies would find me an old milk bottle underneath the sink, where they've used it for years as a pint measure.

CH: And I suppose size-wise, we've got pints of, half pints of, two pints.

Pint and a halves, quarter pints, the third of a pint for a school.

CH: Yes.

STEVE: I've even got gallons.

VO: One of the stars of Steve's collection is this brown bottle.

It was the first ever British milk bottle.

Produced in the 1880s by Express Dairies and designed to ultimately replace the less hygienic milk churns.

Is this what most homes would have had their milk in back in the 1880s?

Yes, they would have had bottles like that.

Right.

And aqua-green glass... ..a special patent bottle, kilners.

Right.

The reason behind the coloring here was they thought... Because the milk wasn't treated in any way - it came straight from the cow - and they thought that if it was on the doorstep in the sunlight... CH: Yes.

STEVE: ..it would last longer if the glass was tinted.

Got you.

Absolute rubbish, of course, but um, they did try.

And a bottle for you.

I have a spare one.

CH: Are you being serious?

STEVE: Absolutely.

So, you're giving me, from the Steve Wheeler collection, a milk bottle, which is named after me - Hanson & Sons.

Model Dairy, Edge Lane.

Steve, I'm absolutely blown away.

VO: Back in Malvern, the day is drawing to a close and David has one last visit to make.

It's Abbey Antiques and proprietor Tony.

With the auction day looming fast and no time to show off their items, David wants to snap up something eye-catching.

It looks like he's found a lump of marble and a crystal ball.

Well, either it's a carpet bowl, go along the carpet, you play a game, one of those long halls.

If the weather was inclement, you'd have a game of bowls and you would use these as indoor bowls.

VO: Oh, nice bit of arm action.

Masterful.

Carpet bowls are a version of the indoor game but what makes it distinct from other types is the 30-foot-long bowling mat.

DB: Date-wise, probably 19th century, early part of this century.

That is a stonemason's art.

Combination of various marbles.

It's such a satisfying piece.

One of these sort of tactile things you'd want to turn your hands, solve any problems.

Any stress, like the stress I suffer with being with Mr Hanson.

(CHUCKLES) VO: Bless him.

Look at him laugh through the pain.

At £10, that layered marbled ball seems a bargain and it turns out, the clear crystal jobbie is also a carpet bowl.

But David is still hunting for that attention grabbing buy.

DB: I just want to it over my face.

TONY: Yes.

Oh good.

Well, don't say it's going to be an improvement.

It's just that I want to see where the eyes are placed here and if I can see through it then I know it's a genuine mask and not one that was made as a tourist souvenir.

That is brilliant.

VO: Hmm, some would say an improvement.

I can't tell.

I can see everything that's going on.

What does it look like?

TONY: Fantastic.

DB: If you turn it inside out, here, you can see where it's been in contact with... TONY: Sweat.

DB: Greasy sweat.

And also down here as well where people have breathed on it and that's been on the nose.

VO: Eurgh!

A mask like this is traditionally used in ritual dances and usually has a spiritual or religious meaning.

It's a form of African art, which has inspired art movements like cubism and expressionism.

Just the sort of thing David loves - nice and grubby.

DB: What's the price on this?

TONY: £90.

Oh!

I can't afford it.

Would you do it at £50 please?

No.

Certainly not.

60 then.

57.

It'll just give me a chance.

Alright.

At 57.

Thank you very much.

I'd love to purchase that.

Thank you.

It's something unusual and when that's held up at the auction, people are going to say "Ah, it's worth having a go at."

And then the other thing - can I just disappear for a few moments?

And I want to retrieve two items I saw outside.

Hold on.

DB: Now... TONY: Ah.

I like these.

That's £10 for the two.

No, no, it's £10 for the one.

For the one.

And this one, you can have for free.

I'll tell you a story about this, because we live next door and this was in our window, and somebody knocked on the door and said, "Do you know that your shop is on fire?"

And we came in here and the sun was shining through this and it burnt a great big hole in an expensive table.

So it'd be good to get rid of it in case it burns the house down.

You want to pass on your bad luck, you're saying?

No, no, not really, no.

Right.

Forget about that one - you've given me that already, I've got it in my hand.

DB: (LAUGHS) There's something wrong with this negotiation here.

What's the very best you can do on that?

TONY: I'll do it for eight.

DB: For £8.

TONY: Yes.

DB: That's the two for £8.

Don't drop it, it's a deal.

Thank you very much indeed.

VO: With the day done, David has bagged four items already.

Charles on the other hand, has only two.

Let's hope tomorrow, he'll up his game.

Toodleoo.

It's day two and while David is at the wheel, Charles is really wishing he was.

Don't forget, David - mirrors, signal, maneuver.

That's such an irritating quality with you sometimes, Charles, an irritating quality.

OK, we'll stop here, David.

DB: Charles... CH: Stop here, David.

DB: Charles.

CH: Stop here.

DB: Are you doing this to annoy me?

VO: Ha-ha!

They're in Tewkesbury, where David did the rounds yesterday and where Charles has to pick up the pace.

VO: So far, Charles has barely spent a penny.

£40 actually on a tea table and £5 on a Chinese teapot.

Tea being the theme of the day.

One lump or two then lads?

David, however, spent £105 and came away with four items, including that scary African mask and those carpet bowls.

So, with the pressure on to buy something with a bit of va-va-vroom to sell at a challenging auction, our boys had better get cracking.

Particularly you, Charles.

Shirt's coming out.

Through here, come on.

VO: Silly boy.

He's making a beeline for Attica Antiques.

Hello, how are you?

Is it your shop?

VO: No, it's a dog, you fool.

Mark's the owner here.

These are quite sweet, aren't they Mark?

And they're charming.

They are a pair of maybe late Edwardian novel ladies' pin cushion boots.

If they were silver, the pair, they would fetch £1,000.

It's very hard sometimes knowing what to go for, isn't it Mark?

VO: For you, Charles, yes.

I always buy too much.

CH: In this picture on the wall... Mm-hm?

Signed by Louis Wain, what do you think of it?

I think that is a genuine Louis Wain, it's just the condition of it that lets it down.

If you wanted to have a look... Yeah, let's take it out, please.

What we've got here is a spurious... ..quite speculative watercolor... ..which purports to be by Louis Wain.

VO: Louis Wain was a Victorian painter, best known for his human-like cat drawings, sometimes portrayed smoking or fishing.

He was declared insane at the end of his life when he thought he had actually become a cat.

His work is popular and often forged.

I just don't know.

You look so closely.

It takes a specialist to say if a picture's the real thing.

A genuine Louis Wain could change hands for more than £1,000.

The ticket price on this piece is £70.

Meow!

It's a difficult one.

I think the one issue with it, Mark, is its condition.

MARK: Yep.

CH: And we can see here, we have had perhaps some water damage or there's been some smudging of the actual sketch, but it is a charming picture.

I'll just show you the back as well.

Yeah.

It's where he's sort of... ..put coffee over it or something to stain it.

And it has been authenticated?

It's been attributed to him by a valuer, so...

It's a difficult one to call.

I ought to stay away.

When you're not sure about something, don't buy it because you learn through your mistakes but it's a picture, which has a good look about it.

What's the best price while I'm on it?

Well, I'd say £70 on it.

I would probably, you know, want to offer maybe half that.

30?

MARK: Go on then.

CH: Thanks Mark.

MARK: I'm vaguely happy at 30.

CH: £30.

VO: Charles is still not sure but at £30, it's worth a scratch.

Mark, if it can go back in the frame, that'd be great.

MARK: I'll have the other one.

CH: That's £30.

Thanks ever so much.

VO: David, meanwhile, has happily escaped Charles and his driving lesson.

He's off to Tewkesbury Museum to unearth some little-known history about one particular local man, with the help of Sue Edline.

I'd like to see what you've got on show.

Would you like to come this way?

Yes, in connection with Sir Raymond Priestley?

That's right.

Oh, is that the gentleman?

This is Sir Raymond Priestley.

DB: To a lot of people, he's the unsung hero, is he not?

SUE: He is indeed.

Many people even in Tewkesbury don't know the story of him.

And what a fascinating story it is.

Born here in 1886, explorer Raymond Priestley first made his name as a geologist on Shackleton's early, less notorious, Nimrod exhibition to Antarctica.

This is one of the things that Raymond took with him to Antarctica.

Probably the early 20th century equivalent of a laptop computer.

DB: Oh yes.

SUE: A very compact typewriter.

And what is this here, this box?

This...

I think he must have kept his treasures in this one.

It's... We just liked it because it had "RE Priestley, geologist", and the date, 1907, and "British Antarctic Expedition."

VO: After narrowly surviving blizzard conditions, Priestley returned to Antarctica a year later as part of the scientific crew on Scott's Terra Nova expedition, working with First Officer Victor Campbell.

They lived for the first year in a hut, which they had to construct themselves when they arrived.

The winds were so fierce there, they had to lash it down with cables.

VO: While Scott made his assault on the South Pole, Priestley and his party moved their scientific work to the coast of Antarctica, but with just eight weeks of rations and extreme weather conditions, the mission proved nearly fatal.

They had a lot of trouble with their tents.

Their tents got blown away and eventually, they dug themselves a cave in the snow, rather like an igloo.

And... they lived in the cave for seven months.

Seven months?

Seven months.

They were like sardines in a tin is the best description I can think of.

What happened to their food supplies?

Did they run down?

They had... Raymond Priestley was in charge of rations.

Instead of having the usual ration of five biscuits a day, they would have one biscuit a day.

They used to celebrate birthdays or special occasions with maybe 12 raisins and a few squares of chocolate.

What a celebration.

Yes.

And this is his ice ax, which was used for his geologies duties, looking at the rock formations and so on, but also used in breaking up penguin and seal when they were isolated in the cave.

And they killed one particular seal, who had just caught some fish and hadn't quite digested them, so it was a very, very welcome change that they fished out of this seal.

VO: After seven months and the Antarctic winter behind them, Priestley's party made the grueling trek to Scott's base camp, only to learn the famous explorer and his polar party had perished.

Being the sort of people they were, they played down their heroic adventure because the nation was mourning Scott.

VO: Priestley did return to Antarctica again in the 1950s but it was his early adventure with Shackleton and Scott that this son of Tewkesbury would best be remembered for.

VO: Our other hero, Charles, meanwhile, is getting through the day with his usual calmness.

Still looking for something else to whet his appetite, which so far has been as dry as a whistle.

Let's pray Annie's tiny shop can spring a surprise.

What we've got here is a very nice little Doulton jardiniere plant pot.

Marked Doulton Lambeth.

What I like is this delightful roundel detail of gilding and opaque turquoise and white jewelling.

OK, we have got the two chips here, which will affect value greatly, but it's only £12 and quite rightly when it is so cheap, it's being used for its function still.

And there's a plant.

Annie, what's in here, you've got some... this is where you often find some real gems.

We've got a lovely little ivory ring rattle, we've also got a very, very nice little silver vesta case, which is hallmarked, hallmarked for Birmingham, with a date code, give or take between friends, he's George V. So, this is around the First World War.

It's heavy, it's silver.

Silver's at a very strong level at present.

There are collectors of vesta case and if you were a gent going to... ..light a fag or cigarette, you'll take your match out here, then you'll close that, strike your match on there and then... off you go.

Nice, isn't it?

ANNIE: It is.

I like it.

VO: Silver vesta cases are collectable and at £38, is there a double deal to be done with the jardiniere?

Annie, what's the best price on the jardiniere?

ANNIE: Um... CH: Priced at £12... ANNIE: I could five on that.

CH: £5, OK. And on your decorative little silver vesta case?

30.

30... is the best.

CH: I do like it.

ANNIE: £35 for the two.

Well, I would need to really pay about 20 for the vesta case, and about five for the jardiniere.

ANNIE: I'll agree to £25.

I don't like customers to escape (CHUCKLES) .

£25, so I'm all set.

See you, Annie.

Bye-bye.

ANNIE: Bye.

CH: Bye.

VO: David however, is taking the day in his stride, like the master he is.

Our veteran antiques bloodhound is at Attica Antiques and has found those very same shoe pin cushions Charles spotted earlier.

DB: They're collectable, aren't they?

DEALER: They are attractive.

DB: Of course, the difficulty with these is that there's so many reproductions.

But these are quite genuine and those laces have been made for these shoes.

VO: These little beauties date from around 1915, judging from the style of the shoe, so fairly modern when you think pin cushions first emerged in the 15th century.

DB: You've got £24 on those.

DEALER: Mm-hm.

DB: What's your very, very best?

16.

I think that's a good price.

You wouldn't do them for 12, would you?

No... 14.

£14.

14.

Thank you very much indeed.

OK.

There we are, Mark, that's £10 and that's £5.

Thank you very much.

VO: So, with the buying all wrapped up in Tewkesbury, it's time now for David and Charles to show their hand.

DB: My first buy... (THEY CHUCKLE) ..is Wedgwood.

OK. And the reason I bought this piece of Wedgwood is because the factory as you know has changed.

Yes.

And I simply adore anything to do with the royal family.

Yes.

DB: But does commemorative ware sell?

No.

Not... David, not really if it's by a lesser name but I think the quality of this, being by Wedgwood, it's got that wonderful modern feel about it and that's iconic, so I like it.

This is my true Road Trip find.

DB: I think it's a lovely little piece.

DB: It is 18th century.

CH: It's 18th century.

DB: It's Chinese.

CH: It's Chinese.

DB: Hard paste.

CH: Hard paste porcelain.

And... it was treasured so much...

There you go.

..that somebody actually put that silver spout on it.

I think that's a lovely collectors piece.

I bought a lump, Charles.

CH: Oh, that's OK. David, no, you're buying for the right marketplace.

I'm hoping you perhaps paid around 25 for it.

(THEY CHUCKLE) How much?

Well, it's yours, Charles, I paid £12.

CH: You didn't?

£12?

DB: Yes.

Oh David.

They say small is beautiful, silver's riding high.

So I bought... that.

That is nice.

How much did you pay for it?

CH: 20.

DB: That's brilliant.

Buy small, low price, guarantee a profit - you've done well.

Thank you very much.

Turn your head.

CH: OK. DB: Completely.

I'll close my eyes.

Go on.

Now, turn round.

Open your eyes... Why's your voice so deep, David?

DB: (YELLS) That's quite interesting.

What do you think?

David, that's a very peculiar, odd item.

DB: For me.

I have no idea about that.

Goodness me.

It's highly speculative.

David, I can't wait for the auction.

I'm feeling really excited.

I'm feeling that there could be fireworks at the auction.

VO: Now, is Charles's Louis Wain picture a fake or not?

David might know.

It's a wrong one.

Yeah, I think it is.

This paper's been aged.

Do you think it has?

Yeah.

That's the true color of the paper.

CH: Yes.

DB: This is all paintwork DB: to age it.

CH: Yeah.

Ah... it's, it's... Look.

Hold it up to the light.

It's as recent as yesterday.

The signature is wrong.

CH: Correct.

DB: It's too controlled.

CH: Is that it?

DB: I have two.

CH: (LAUGHS) Look, there we are.

Whoops!

I like it.

David, you know, it's... David, you know, I'm lost for words because... Do you like them?

I think they're wonderful.

I'm not quite sure what you do with your balls but, I mean, they're paperweights or whatever.

They're in good condition, they've got no cracks.

They're spotless.

It's esthetic, let's be completely realistic, CH: there's one chip.

DB: Two chips.

There's also a chip there as well, that's my handling done.

DB: And there's a crack inside.

CH: Is there a crack?

Oh, dear me, I missed a crack.

There's a crack inside.

That's great, isn't it, hey?

That really kills my vase.

DB: It's a jardiniere.

CH: What's it worth?

DB: It's damaged.

CH: What's it worth?

DB: Tenner.

(CHUCKLES) CH: Thanks, David.

CH: Oh no!

DB: What?

CH: I don't believe it!

DB: What?

I almost bought them.

David, I think they're great fun.

They'll walk away without any problem at all.

I hope so - they look comfortable.

They are.

Now, David, lift your arms, lift your arms.

Don't be telling me it's a suit of arms...

Lift your arms.

OK, like a magician, I'll say... here it is.

(THEY CHUCKLE) I thought you were going to... Oh, how lovely.

It's been heavily restored.

I know it has.

It's had new brackets underneath.

I know.

The actual column has been cleaned down.

I think so.

And I bet you paid something like 25 quid for it.

CH: No, I paid more.

DB: How much?

I paid £40.

It's not bad.

VO: So, niceties apart, what did they really think about each other's lots?

I thought his picture after Louis Wain - dreadful.

Absolutely dreadful.

It's blatantly a forgery, a fake, a faux.

I think the only real problem might be with that little African mask head, which could just falter at £57.

I think David's big success will probably be...

The delightful icicle glass Murano vase will also do well.

VO: It's the day of reckoning.

After kicking off in Malvern, the second leg of this road trip comes to an end in Pewsey... a pretty Wiltshire town, which sits on a stretch of the 87-mile Kennet and Avon Canal.

The Jubilee Auction Rooms are today's battleground and the tension is building.

Our boys have been shopping right up to the wire.

And what's more, the Hillman Minx is on a go-slow.

CH: David, it's so slow, this car.

DB: I don't think jumping up and down is gonna aid it, Charles.

DB: (LAUGHS) CH: Shall we leave it here?

DB: Leave it there, yeah.

VO: I'd dump it.

So, with the clock ticking, let's see what auctioneer David Harrison thinks of our experts' buys.

I think that the nicest thing that's come in today is the 18th Century blue and white Chinese teapot.

Someone's loved that for 200, 250 years and that's just a wonderful piece of social history.

The George III little circular tea table, we see them all the time.

I think it's just a run of the mill item and possibly will make £40 to £60.

VO: David, joking apart, starting this leg with £298.20 and has spent a glorious £119 on five auction lots.

Rival Charles, however, started with £243.80 and has spent £100 exactly.

So, time to see if they can swing a profit.

Shall we hold hands for good luck?

Yes, but not too long, please.

VO: Steady, lads.

So it's David's ruby glass vase to start.

Lot 162... Come on, David.

Is the 1950s Murano clear and ruby glass vase.

£30 for this, nice piece of Murano, 30, 20.

10 then.

10, thank you.

Yes!

£10, at £10.

I'll take 12 now.

£12 seated.

£12, £14, the pair.

Here to be sold.

That's a good price.

At £14 then, lady's bid down here.

All done at £14.

VO: Well, it's a profit, but David's not happy.

The whole thing's so unbelievably disappointing.

I think we're both in for a bloodbath here but you know what, David?

If we go down together, we go down together fighting, OK?

VO: Oh crumbs!

Let's hope David's Wedgwood mug can put a smile back on his face.

AUCTIONEER: £20 for this.

£20.

CH: Come on.

AUCTIONEER: £10 away.

CH: Come on.

AUCTIONEER: 10 somewhere surely.

CH: Couple of pounds.

£10, thank you sir.

10 I've got, £10 at £10 for the Queen's ware.

Absolutely devastating, really disappointing.

At £12 then, in the doorway at £12.

VO: Oh dear!

That's giving it away.

Now for that controversial Louis Wain picture.

Very, very, very attractive little picture in the style of Louis Wain.

It might make £5.

If it does... c'est la vie, David.

We're in it together.

I've got commission bids and I open the bidding at £20.

£20!

Come on!

£20.

At 20, make two now.

22, 22.

24, commission.

CH: Come on.

Keep going.

DB: I can't believe it.

26, sir.

Outside at 26, 28 commission.

At £28.

There's a commission bid against you all at £28.

(GAVEL) That's a shame but thanks for coming.

VO: If only you'd gone with your gut feeling, Charles.

Charles, I'm getting rather excited now.

This is my major piece coming up.

It's the mask.

20 I'm bid, 22 now, 22.

24 sir.

At 24.

Come on.

At £24, the bid's on my left, £24.

All done.

(GAVEL) VO: Oh no!

A £33 loss and David's feeling the pain.

I'm just collapsing.

Really.

But it's as I predicted.

VO: So, can Charles get lucky with the vesta case?

20 I've got.

Oh, come on, it's worth that.

25.

28, 30.

Take two, sir.

32, 32.

At £32, then.

Seated at 32.

(GAVEL) DB: Well done, Charles.

Thanks, David.

You made a profit of £12, that's excellent.

CH: Well... VO: Charles is all smiles.

Now, David's got to hit the jack with his carpet bowls.

10 I've got, commission bid at £10.

At £10.

CH: That's a profit.

Profit!

DB: It is good.

14, 16, at 16.

£18 commission, at 18.

CH: Well done, David.

DB: One more.

CH: Well done.

AUCTIONEER: All done at £18.

DB: Er... £10 profit.

CH: You made £10.

Well done.

VO: Yeah, but David's still slipping behind.

Can he stitch a comeback with these pincushions?

I almost bought these, David.

Please don't make too much.

Straight in, £30 somewhere?

10?

Does anyone like them?

£10 I'm bid, £12 sir, thank you.

£12.

Come on!

One more bid!

Ugh!

14, at 14, 16.

Can't believe this.

This is hard work today.

At £16, done, finished, 16.

VO: Ha!

A small profit, but will it be enough to take the lead?

With the way the auction's going, with the way thing's are falling so far short, this teapot could make £10.

Will I be upset?

Yes, I will be.

VO: I hope there won't be tears - I just couldn't bear it.

£20.

10 then.

CH: Oh!

AUCTIONEER: 10.

Thank you, sir.

£10 I'm bid, £10 only.

At £10, at 10, 12, 14.

Come on!

This is crazy!

At £14, at 14, 16.

18, at £18.

At £18, I'm going to sell it at £18.

You made a profit, I'm making losses.

So don't grumble at that.

VO: You tell him, David!

Now for Charles's jardiniere with the hairline crack and minus the plant.

It could be yours, Doulton Lambeth.

Believe it, there it is, have a go.

It could be yours.

DB: You're not... Should go up there!

I'm up here, you're down there.

There is a reason for that.

My apologies, sir.

Thank you very much.

10 I've got, thank you, £10, bid 10, at £10.

12, thank you, that worked.

At £12.

14 with me, at 14.

16 now in the room.

At £16 and I'm going to sell it for £16.

(GAVEL) VO: Charles is scenting blood.

David, I am now £34 profit.

DB: You've still got your table to come.

VO: And here it is.

The apparently 226-year-old tripod table.

Is victory at hand for Charles?

If this table can at least break even, we are going to be almost neck and neck.

AUCTIONEER: 40.

DB: You're in.

AUCTIONEER: 45.

CH: One more.

DB: That's good, that's good.

CH: One more.

Take five.

£50.

At £50 then, bid's on my left.

(GAVEL) Good.

VO: And today's winner is... Charles!

I think we deserve a cup of tea.

Yes, we do.

Come on, David.

Well done.

I'm delighted.

VO: David started this second leg with £298.20 and, after auction costs, made a loss - ooh!

- of £50.12, leaving him with £248.08.

Charles began with £243.80 and made £18.08 after costs, putting him in the lead with £261.88 going into round three.

Still looks a bit moody though, doesn't he?

DB: Congratulations.

CH: Can you believe it?

DB: I shall chauffer you... CH: Can you believe it?

I am now ahead of the infamous David Barby.

Don't worry, I've been in your position many a time.

CH: (CHUCKLES) How does it feel?

DB: What?

CH: Losing to me.

Despondent, I want to cry.

CH: (LAUGHS) VO: Ha-ha!

Next time on the Road Trip, we're off to Herefordshire, where Charles gets his geography all mixed up.

Isn't Hay-on-Wye also in Wales?

DB: Er... CH: Is Ross... DB: Ross-on-Wye is not in Wales.

VO: David gets nostalgic.

My father bought me a Hornby train set.

VO: Charles is all butterfingers.

Sorry!

Sorry.

DEALER: It's alright.

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